Know Yourself

I run along a small section of the Riverfront Trail several mornings a week. It’s a one-and-a-half mile straight path, paved along the Mississippi River, spread directly in front of the St. Louis arch.

On this path, someone spraypainted “Know Yourself” in bold and colorful font on some raised cement barriers. It’s probably been there for years. I cross it on almost every run and on some days, if I’m feeling spry, I jump over it.

I think that knowing yourself is a challenge on two fronts. First, it takes courage to test your mental and physical limits. You have to pass a threshold to know where the threshold lies, and that involves pain. Significant, significant pain. Second, knowing yourself means confronting your dark side, and that takes courage. Just look to Luke Skywalker or Jung for reasons why. The dark side is an ugly place and a convenient one to turn a blind eye towards. I’m not sure most are willing to look at their demons with eyes wide open. The dark side of the human soul can reach horrifying depths, but overcoming one’s dark side first requires accepting its existence and seeing what lurks there.

Knowing yourself, the good and the bad, probably nurtures some self-confidence. It leaves you impervious to external remarks because you create your self-perception internally. Verbal attacks tend to hurt most if you accept them as reality, and you’re more likely to accept any opinion if you don’t know who you are. If what your attacker says is true, but you recognize it as true and have already confronted it within yourself, you can shrug off the attack. That’s essentially how Eminem’s character won the rap battle at the end of 8 Mile.

Recently I told someone that one of my goals with endurance running was longevity: that I want to keep running and cycling into my 80s and even 90s. That’s the truth, besides simply enjoying the exercise: I do it because I want to live. The races are just a fun bonus. I was laughed at for saying that. Well, what can ya do? Everyone has haters. “You run marathons for longevity!? Yeah right.” Later in the conversation I was sarcastically called “Longevity Matt.”

It would be easy to feel offended by the skepticism, but I shrugged it off. I know what I want well enough to discard external critics. Maybe five years ago I’d have taken it personally. Age has at least given the gift of “knowing myself” better, and knowing yourself begets wisdom.

I can only conclude that literally jumping over physical barriers, especially barriers with a message such as “Know Yourself,” is a healthy daily ritual.